5 Tips For Infant Massage

Babies grow super fast. This is no secret. But often in the hustle and bustle of each day sometimes it can be easy to forget what this means for your baby. Imagine if you were going to the gym every day, for around 8-10 hours. No heavy impact, but lots and lots of Pilates style aerobic exercise, weight lifting, and yoga. Just think about how exhausted and sore you would be. Then as you rest, the pain of bone growth would set in. Maybe this isn't exactly how babies feel, but as one who has observed babies over and over again during their first few months, I think it is pretty close sometimes. This is just one reason why I'm such a strong believer in baby massage. Another is that as a mother of an extremely premature son I relied on the calming and relaxing effect of infant massage very often. In this post I will cover some of the best massage strokes for a calming and soothing effect on your baby.

1. Arms and legs

Starting near your little Yogi's hands, gently wrap your hand around his forearm. Then, with minimal pressure, slide your hand toward the shoulder/armpit area. To keep your baby's arm extended as you do this, you can hold your baby's hand with one of your hands, while your other hand executes the massage stroke. Repeat this stroke about 5-10 times on each limb, or as many as feels right and relaxing for you and your baby. When using this stroke on your baby's legs, hold the foot with one hand, start the stroke at the ankle, and slide until you reach the hip.

2. Chest and stomach

There are a lot of strokes that are recommended for a baby's stomach and chest. My favorite for the chest is to start with your hands together each covering one side of her rib cage. Then slowly fan your fingers out toward your baby's sides starting with your pinky fingers until your hands are splayed out across her chest. Then smoothly continue the motion down the sides of your mini-buddha's belly all the way down to her hips. Repeat this stroke between 5-10 times, or as many as feels right and relaxing to you and your baby.
On the stomach the most basic soothing stroke is a circular one that moves in a clockwise direction around your little one's belly-button. Be careful not to get too close to the belly-button, you want to be a minimum of 1-2 inches (2.5-5 cm) away from it at all times. This is clock-wise from YOUR perspective, meaning if you start on your babies right side (the one most easily reached by your left hand) you should first move up and over your baby's belly button, then down and under it, until you end up right where you began. The pressure should be minimal, and you can leave your baby's clothing on if it is more relaxing to do so. This stroke is best used at a minimum of 20 minutes after a feeding, and can be used as much and as often as your baby seems to enjoy it (though the first 20 minutes after eating is not the best time).

3. Back and shoulders

With your baby laying on his stomach, you can use this basic gentle stroke to help calm, and move gas out his lower exit. Starting with one hand over each shoulder blade using gentle pressure slide the heels of your palms down both sides of your little athlete's back at the same time until they reach the diaper line. Put no pressure on his spine, and be aware of trying not to tickle your baby in this position. While tickling will not hurt him, it can be counter-productive when your goal is relaxation. This stroke can be repeated anywhere between 10-20 times, as long as your baby is enjoying it and it is relaxing for both of you.
For the shoulders it is not important for your baby to be laying on his stomach, or back. Either position is fine as long as he is comfortable and relaxed. This is more of a hold than a stroke, as you cup your hands around each of your baby's shoulders and gently pull down toward his hips. I recommend you pull both shoulders at once, but you can do one at a time as well if your baby seems to like it better. No kneading or rubbing is needed for this, just gently pull, and hold for about 20-30 seconds, then release. You can repeat this hold a few times if your baby seems to be particularly calmed by it, but using it too often can cause tension, so trust your instincts and watch your baby for cue's.

4. Feet and hands

Though an open-palm massage is often soothing for an adult, infants often find it too stimulating, and even ticklish. It is much more calming for your baby to have your hand cover her fist and  gently squeeze it while it is closed. Just a small amount of pressure as you cover her fists is enough to release the clenching that she normally has to do herself, and is normally very calming. This hold can be maintained for about 20-30 seconds, and repeated as often as it is comfortable and relaxing for you and your baby.
Similarly, when massaging your little sweet-peas toes you want to avoid tickling her. So softly cover the toe-end of her feet from about the arch and all around the top and bottom at the same time. Then you will move in four directions. First up, gently stretching the toes slightly up toward her knees, then down subtly pointing her toes away from her body like a little ballerina. Next, you will rotate her feet slightly counter clockwise, very gently, and watching her for any signs of discomfort. Follow this by rotating her feet in exactly the she gentle way clockwise. The timing for this part of the massage should be about 2-5 seconds for each direction that your move her toes. When I'm doing this massage, I think to myself: "Up-two-three, down-two-three, twist left-two-three, twist right-two-three, release." Though you can repeat the foot massages often as you and your infant are finding it to be relaxing.

5. Face and ears

Massaging your baby's face can be quite soothing, but it is easy to cause stress if you are not careful where you touch. I recommend this stroke as a way to avoid most of the trigger points for feeding instincts. Starting directly above your little snuggle-pop's eyebrow on the end nearest to the nose, run your fingertips softly along the length of the eyebrow, then across the temple and around the outer edge of of his ear. Not on the ear, but on his head behind his ear. If it is easy for you to do both sides at once, this is more relaxing, but if you find it easier to stroke one side then the other, do that instead. Repeat this stroke as often as you like, using very soft pressure, and slow soothing motion.
Your baby's ears are soft, and sensitive, so vigorous massaging of any kind will most likely not be very soothing. However gently holding the large outer edge and lifting it slightly away from his head can be very soothing indeed. Again, I think of this as more of a "hold" than a stroke, and no kneading or pulling is necessary. Just a gentle grasp and lift should be enough to do the trick. Only maintain the hold for about 5-10 seconds, unless the baby seems to be especially enjoying himself. This hold, and face massage, are best used when your baby has just come in from an overly-stimulating walk, or just after leaving a noisy room with bright lights.

Though it is always important to be in tune with your little bundle's needs, when giving an infant massage it is also very important to be relaxed and grounded yourself. Listen to your instincts, watch your baby's reactions to the different strokes and holds, and if something seems to be causing stress or discomfort, discontinue it at once. Soft music, a warm room, a gently scented hypo-allergenic organic massage oil, all of these things are nice, but not essential to your ability to give an effective and relaxing infant massage.
If you have found these tips to be helpful, please share them with any new or expecting parents you know. Comments, questions, and requests are always welcome. I am working on illustrating this post, and hopefully will have something up soon. Happy parenting!

There is a NEW post from NAOMI up today! Check it out HERE.

5 More Tips For Relieving Your Baby's Gas Pains

One of the most consistent issues parents face with their new babies is the discomfort that gas can cause. That is why I am revisiting this topic. For a new baby, gas is inevitable. For the first couple months the digestive system is still adapting to both processing nutrients and expelling waste. The issues that cause gas pain are related to both slow movement of waste through the bowels, and difficulty digesting. Even when your baby is only eating breast milk or formula the simple process of breaking down the nutrients can be hard on your little sugar-pop. So here are five more things you can try.

1. Warm peppermint and fennel compress.
To make a compress  wrap a some fresh peppermint and fennel with a soft piece of cotton cloth and soak in warm with water for about two minutes. After soaking, squeeze out the excess water and place the warm damp compress on your little darling's lower abdomen. To finish, wrap a cloth around your baby and the compress to make sure it won't move. Leave the compress on for about 20 minutes, re-moistening it with a bit of the same warm water that you soaked it in to begin with about every five minutes or so. The scent is calming and the herbal properties of fennel and peppermint have been used to assist in digestion for hundreds of years. Using a compress is a very good natural way to help your sweet little bubble blower absorb a bit of the herbal benefits gently, and in a way that doesn't give her tummy more new substances to digest.

2. Give a supplemental bottle of water.
One thing that your baby can ingest that does not cause gas is water. Water is not digested in the same way as other foods, and so causes no gas by itself. Also water can dilute other fluids making it harder for gas bubbles to form. Although he may not drink much, just a little bit goes a long way. Water can also stimulate the bowels to move, which is very helpful. It is important to note that you should not replace a feeding with a bottle of water, since there is no nutritional value, but a little extra water after a feeding can do wonders for a little tooter who is prone to gas trouble.

3. Swaddle with your infants legs folded.
When your infant has trouble with gas, one sign is when she pushes her legs straight out. This is an instinctual reaction to abdominal pain and is meant to help push off anything that might be pushing on her belly. However, pushing the legs out straight actually tightens your little giggler's behind muscles, which doesn't help matters move along.When your infants legs are wrapped up in a folded "criss-cross-applesauce" style in front of her, the instinctual tightening of the abdomen in response to gas pain is much more helpful. To do this type of swaddle, wrap the arms as you normally would, normally, then fold the legs up and crossed. While holding the legs with one hand bring the bottom section of the blanket up and tuck it into the front of the swaddle. It is also important to remember that all swaddling should either leave your baby's legs free to kick about or have them wrapped up near the body with the knees apart to prevent hip dysplaisia which can sometimes result from straight-leg swaddling.

4. Tummy time across your thighs.
Sometimes the gentle pressure of regular tummy time is not enough to relax your infant's abdomen. Or your little pipsqueek may just dislike regular tummy time, and the combination of the pain and the position may make the situation worse. In these cases, laying your baby across your thighs, with their head on one thigh, and their tummy on the other is a great thing to try. Not only is contact with you soothing, but as your baby lays on your lap, you can gently bounce the leg that his tummy is resting on very lightly. Let his legs hang down as you do this and softly stroke and pat his back. The combination of your warmth, the gentle pressure, and the position of the legs is often a near magical combination for producing the relief your baby needs.

5. A foot massage.
For babies that have a continuing problem of gas I like to suggest trying a reflexology massage. Reflexology is the art of stimulating areas on the feet and/or ears to affect other areas of the body. It is similar to acupressure, but the way it is applied has more room for error. The area of your baby's feet that is associated with the bowels is in the center of the bottom of the foot  between the arch and the ball of the heel. As your baby lays on her back hold her feet up and gently rub this area in a soft circular motion for a few minutes. This gas relieving reflexology method can be done a few times during the day. I like to do it just before the morning feeding, just before the later afternoon nap, and just before the bedtime feeding. The reason I do it before feedings and before sleep is because the way that reflexology works is not immediate. Reflexology is designed to treat the underlying issues (in this case movement of waste through the bowels, and efficient digestion), not to relieve the immediate symptoms.

Though there is no cure-all perfect remedy that will work for every baby, these tips have come in very handy for me over the years. Some babies are more prone to gas and gas-related pain than others, but the nice thing about babies is that they outgrow these kinds of things eventually. It is very important for you as a parent to remember to try and stay calm and gentle in these frustrating times. Keep trying new things until you find something that works, and then enjoy the silence as long as you can. The only thing as intense as a the feeling of frustration when a baby cries is the feeling of relief when they finally stop. If you have found these tips helpful, please forward them to any new or expecting parents you know. Questions and comments are always welcome. Happy parenting!

There is a NEW post from NAOMI up today (9/5/14)! Check it out HERE.

I'm Back.

I would like to apologize to all my readers for my long absence. After my family moved to Utah we experienced quite a few changes. There have been some pretty tough times over the last two years, and when push came to shove I had to let go of my blog for a while. I am thankful to all of the emails and letters of support I have received over the last couple years, and I do apologize for how few I was able to respond to. I have recently moved back to the city of San Francisco, and have resumed my career in child care.

As a quick announcement, I have recently contracted with Day One in San Francisco to teach my Infant Acupressure techniques in their San Francisco location. The first class will be held on January 26th 2012. For more information, or to register, please visit their site.

Thank you all for your continued support and interest. As before, I am interested in any feedback or questions you may have for me. Happy parenting!

- Naomi

5 tips for the best baby toys for 6-12 months.

Nearly over night sweet little babies has grow and changed so much that it can be hard to know what toys are best at ay given age. Are rattles still a good choice now that your baby can sit up? Or should you brows the local toy store looking for toys that are approved for the specific age that your baby is now? Well, despite what toy manufacturers would have you believe, baby development, and its relationship to the toys your baby plays with, is far from an exact science. I think that there are a few toys that seem to be a pretty good bet, but beyond the basics, it is 100% personal choice. You know your baby better than anyone and if you think your baby will enjoy playing with a certain toy, you are most likely right. Here are a few suggestions as a place to start from.

1. Lamaze Spin and Explore Garden Gym.
After your baby has a strong and stable neck, but before he is creeping and crawling all over the place, it is the perfect time for this toy. Rarely will I recommend a toy from a specific manufacturer, but to my knowledge, this is the only toy of it's kind right now. This toy might strike you as a bit odd the first time you see it because of the slightly elevated lady-bug in the center of the mat, but once you and your baby get the hang of it you will both enjoy exploring the circular "garden". Making tummy time more enjoyable for your baby is a constant struggle for parents, but this is one toy that many parents find helpful.

2. A ball.
Once your baby can sit up on her own for several minutes at a time, the magical toy that has existed for many a millennium can be introduced to your little pip squeak. Well, you can introduce a ball or two before now, but around the age of 6 months will be when your baby should start to engage with and really enjoy playing with a ball. Try rolling it to your baby while she sits with her legs crossed. When she picks it up tell her that she "caught" it. Then encourage her to roll it back to you. This type of play encourages the development of reciprocal play, the concept of taking turns and gives you an opportunity to build your little chickadee's self esteem as well as her vocabulary.

3. An electronic floor piano.
An electronic floor piano or a low-to-the-ground regular piano are toys that encourage tummy time while stimulating your little pianist's cognitive development. If the version you select is electric but not battery powered, I recommend that you closely monitor your baby while he plays with it in order to avoid the possibility of his becoming entangled in the cord or becoming interested in where it plugs into the wall. Another fun option is a cordless synthesizer. You can change the sounds from piano to marimba or even saxophone or human voice if you prefer. Just be careful about monitoring play with one of these because since they are generally not intended for babies, the keys or buttons might come off with rough use.

4. Toy remote control or cell phone.
Since your real remote control and cell phones are going to be favorite toys whether you want them to be or not, you can try to give your baby a safer option for these fun things. It may sound funny to offer toys to your baby that are such adult tools, but it is natural for babies to want to be like their parents from a young age. They look to you as the source for all things fun, interesting and good, so when they see you constantly talking into something covered with buttons that shows pretty pictures too, of course they want to play with it. Offering them their own version can save you both a power struggle and the hassle of having to replace your cell phone every few weeks.

5. A walker.
This is going to be my most controversial suggestion in this post. Infant physical therapists have come out pretty strongly against walkers, because of the tendency of little ones to begin putting weight on their legs before their bones are ready for it. However, after your baby is naturally beginning to creep and even crawl, pulling up onto furniture is a natural progression. As long as the walker is introduced at a developmentally appropriate time, and your home has been sufficiently baby-proofed for the added height that a walker gives, this is a wonderful way to let your baby explore her world while encouraging physical activity and giving you a little bit of a break.

Honestly, almost anything makes a great toy for a baby in the age range of 6 months to a year, the only real limitation you need to consider is for safety. Coins are shiny and make a great jingling sound, but they are germ-ridden choking hazards. Real cell phones are colorful and covered with neat buttons, but they melt down at the first hint of baby drool and they can come apart more easily than you'd expect. Plastics often leach questionable chemicals, especially those not used in baby-specific products and glass or wooden objects are breakable and can be finished with toxic chemicals respectively. When considering what to give your baby to play with, always ask yourself "what's the worst that could happen?" and if the answer is not good, choose something else. If you have found these tips to be helpful and informative, please forward this site to any new or expecting parents you know. Questions, comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for staying organized after you have a baby.

Although having a new baby can throw your life into chaos, you don't have to let that decrease your ability to keep an ordered household. Try setting small goals for yourself, and setting out generous time lines for their completion. Chances are you will have less than half the time and less than half the energy you used to have to spend on organization projects. I recommend picking one tip that looks particularly helpful, like the clothing tip, and getting started on it early. As babies grow, they sleep less and less during the day, use the day time naps wisely in your first 3 months. By the second month you should have a good system in place for keeping incoming gifts of clothing organized, and you can move on to implementing another tip that seems particularly helpful to you in your own circumstances.

1. Separate baby clothes into like sizes and store in clear bins.
After the birth of your little sugar bee, you will most likely find yourself inundated with gifts of second-hand baby clothing, as well as gorgeous new stylish outfits from friends and family. However a good 90% of these wonderful donations and presents will be too large for your baby to wear right away. Rather than just stuffing them all into drawers and boxes and bags in the closet, developing a system to easily sort and store them will relieve a constant irritation and frustration from your first year or two. I recommend getting 5 large clear bins from an office supply store and labeling them: 3-6 Months, 6-12 Months, 12-18 Months, 24+ Months and Give Away or Store. When you first receive clothing, immediately put it in the baby's laundry. This is not meant as an insult to friends and family, but keeping the detergent that your baby is exposed to limited to your exact brand will help limit possible allergic reactions, and many new clothes are packaged with harsh chemicals that should be washed out before your baby wears them. As the new clothing emerges from the laundry, take your regular laundry-folding time to sort the clothes by the sizes listed on the tags (if there is no size, compare it to similarly sized clothes and write a size in the neck or lining with a permanent pen). Then, as you put the clothes away, you can place the cleaned, sorted and folded clothes in their appropriate storage bins. This also will help you keep an eye on what sizes of clothing you might need to get more of. Sizes 0 (or infant) through 3 months can be fairly easily organized in most baby nurseries, and as you move up in sizes, use your sorting time while folding laundry to remove items that are too small, and place them in the 5th bin for give-away or storage. Just try to stay on top of maintaining this system, because if it gets out of control the job becomes pretty intimidating pretty quickly.

2. Implement the "one toy at a time" rule early.
Baby toys seem to have a life of their own sometimes. I have a theory that they secretly multiply at night, but I have yet to catch them in the act. To keep your living room from becoming a mine field of ankle-twisting toe-stubbing hazards, I recommend that you, your partner, your friends and family all be held to the rule that only one baby toy can be out at any one time. No doubt they will call you crazy, and think you are taking things too seriously, but eventually they will marvel over how clean you are able to keep your living room. You will also be able to spend less on replacing broken toys and vacuum cleaner parts.

3. Use decorative dispensers that you can place things in while still in their original packaging.
There have been about a million times that I have seen beautiful nurseries set up with all kinds of pretty diaper-dispensers, wipes dispensers and fancy bottles to put baby lotion in that get completely over run with packages of diapers propped up against them and packages of wipes on top of them and bottles of baby lotions jammed in between the pretty bottles that are empty. If you have a hanging diaper holder that is the right size, you can just slip the whole package of diapers in there, and save yourself the hassle of unpacking and stacking. I would do away with the idea of decorative bottles for baby lotion all together, or use cozies instead. Also, refills of diaper wipes should be able to go into just about any container while still in their plastic over-wrap. You may be reading this thinking that you'll never be so busy that putting a bag of diapers away will seem like an enormous job, but once you have a baby you might find yourself quite surprised by how fast you move through things, and how little extra time and energy you actually have.

4. Incorporate a 10 minute tidy/top off into your evening routine.
Just after your little luv-bunch nods off for his 1-2 hour sleep in the evening, try to spend ten minutes picking up things that didn't make it to where they were supposed to go, topping off containers that are near empty and making sure that your changing table is properly stocked. Just ten minutes every evening will help keep your organization systems running and your sanity from taking a vacation. If the ten minute tidy becomes a habit, you might find that it can help you stay on top of your household order for years to come.

5. Place baby logs near where you feed your baby & attach a pen.
Keeping track of what is going on with your baby is both important and deceptively easy. All you have to do is jot down the last few things that happened with her every few hours or so. The problem comes when you are unable to find the book that you log your baby's bowel movements in or you can't find a pen to write with, or you know where they are, but you have a sleeping baby on your lap, and you don't want to move from fear that she will wake up. I recommend that you attach a pen with a short string to your baby log, and attach the baby log with a short string to the chair or couch where you normally feed your baby. This way, you'll always know where it is, and you will find yourself tied down near it often enough that keeping at least a partial record of your baby's ups, downs, ins and outs will be much easier. Wet and dirty diapers, sleep patterns, medication administration times, feeding amounts and feeding times are all important things to keep a record of. If your baby takes ill, and you have to rush to the Pediatrician, it is great to have a written record of all the things that you will be asked. It is surprising how much information we lose through each day if we don't write it down, and new parents are hardly getting refreshing sleep every night.

As with all lifestyle changes, the most important thing to keep in mind is to make organizational changes that you can maintain. Setting unrealistic goals for yourself will only lead to frustration and self-defeat. If you are an organized person, many of these suggestions may come as second nature to you, but for many parents figuring out where to start when trying to organize a growing household can be overwhelming. I hope that one or two of these suggestions helps relieve a bit of the stress that comes with the chaos of an expanding family. If you have found these tips helpful please forward them to any new or expecting parents you know. Comments, questions and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for caring for your toddlers teeth.

At some point your little toothless butter ball is going to sprout some teeth. Toddlers teeth appear in a fairly predictable pattern: two on the bottom in front, four on the top in front, two more on the bottom front, four molars two on top and two on the bottom, four canines two on top and two on bottom, and finally four more molars. From the time that your baby's first tooth sprouts it is time to start implementing oral care. For the first six months or so, after those first couple of teeth show up, a washcloth dipped in a weak mixture of water and baking soda should be enough to combat any type of decay. However, at some point you will need to introduce the toothbrush in order to continue to maintain good oral hygiene for your toddler. Here are a few more helpful ideas for getting the most out of your little beavers tooth brushing routine.

1. Get an electric toothbrush.
It may seem a bit extravagant, but for your toddler it will make brushing his teeth a lot more fun. A regular tooth brush is fine if you can't afford or find an electric one, but it has a lot of drawbacks. Firstly, your little grin master will only let a foreign object which is under your control in his mouth for a very limited time, so getting to all the teeth and brushing them thoroughly will be harder. Also, your toddler will quickly lose interest in the idea of using the regular toothbrush as a tooth-cleaning tool and will begin to think of it as a funny spoon that is for feeding him baby toothpaste, which kind of defeats the purpose. And finally, the struggles that you have over trying to get your little guy to use the regular toothbrush properly might instill a strong aversion to the idea of brushing teeth. An electric model is interesting, fun and easy to use. You can often brush your little chompers teeth in half the time with half the struggle.

2. Teach your toddler to chew gum.
I know that this might sound counter intuitive, and just so we are clear I'm not talking about huge wads of sugary goo. I'm just talking about huge wads of goo. The American Dental Association has come out in support of sugar free gum, especially gum that contains xylitol. They recommend giving your children gum to chew for about 20 minutes after meals in addition to regular brushing. To teach your toddler how to chew gum, give her a large amount to start with. One and a half sticks should be enough to discourage swallowing without raising the risk of choking. The entire wad should be about the size of your toddlers thumb. After your toddler has gotten the basic idea of chewing without swallowing, you can reduce the amount of gum you give.

3. Offer your toddler a sippy cup of water before bed.
Throughout the day food, milk and juice will leave residue in your toddlers mouth. Even if you brush once in the afternoon and once at bedtime the food and drink particles in your little nibbler's mouth can do some damage during the rest of the day. Having some water will help rinse away most of those harmful little tooth destroyers. I recommend giving your toddler a sippy cup of water in the morning and in the afternoon. Not only is drinking water a great habit for preventing tooth decay, but the health benefits of drinking water throughout the day will have lasting positive effects in all aspects of your toddlers development.

4. Sing a fun song or rhyme while you brush.
Getting your toddler to spend an appropriate length of time scrubbing his chompers can be very difficult. A great trick to help extend the time he spends brushing his teeth is to sing a little song or recite a rhyme while he brushes. Having a nice rhythm to brush to helps your toddler grasp the concept of repeated up and down/back and forth brushing. Also, knowing that the song comes to an end will help you little brush man anticipate how long he should brush. Time is still a slippery concept, and after 10 seconds your little fella might feel like he's been at it for hours, but a song or rhyme will keep him going for a few more minutes.

5. Give your toddler a turn.
To make sure your toddlers teeth get sufficiently clean, you should take the first turn with the toothbrush. A quick once-over from you will get the best results, but then turn over the tooth brush to your little chicklet so she can both imitate the example you just set and gain a feeling of personal pride in her ability to brush her teeth by herself. Doing the brushing at the beginning, rather than after your toddler has had a try at it, will help avoid your little bubbie from feeling like she has done something wrong and is being corrected while giving her a good example to follow for her own turn. As she gets better at brushing, you can eventually let her take over and do the whole routine herself.

One of the best ways to save money as your children get older is to eliminate expensive dental bills, and this starts with good oral hygiene habits. Teaching your little sugar-fiend how to care for his teeth early will instill a great sense of awareness that can have lasting positive effects. Remember to talk to your dentist for the latest information on childhood tooth care and to schedule regular checkups for your little snuggle bug. If you have found these tips helpful, please forward them to all the parents of toddlers that you know. Questions, comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

Toddler Tuesday: 5 tips to help your toddler build social confidence.

As your baby grows and develops into a little person, social skills and confidence will become increasingly important. For your little one milestones, like entering preschool or going to a new park, can be terrifying experiences, or exciting new adventures waiting to be explored. To help your little trooper prepare for these new challenges it is important to inspire a strong sense of socially appropriate behavior and respect for himself and others. Though there are many strategies out there, these five are my personal favorite, because I've seen them work.

1. Play dates with older kids.
Play dates of any kind are great for toddlers. However, for learning social skills a slightly older child is a wonderful roll model. Just one or two older children are plenty, any more, and your little social butterfly might start feeling shy or get ignored. The ages of the older child or children shouldn't be more than a year older than your little one so they will still identify with one another. The benefits to your little cub will be quite obvious, but the older child will benefit as well. When older children play with younger ones, they build their sense of empathy and gain confidence too.

2. Sign up for gym class.
Or a dance class, or a karate class. Physical activity can help children of all ages overcome social barriers. Class settings provide a great social structure complete with rules, turn taking and example setting and following. These skills translate directly to social interaction, and the confidence your little ducky will get from learning new physical skills will translate into confidence when confronted with any new and intimidating situation. You might think that a toddler is too young for a class like this, but there are many classes available, including Gymboree, that are specifically designed with toddlers in mind.

3. Introduce manners.
As your little flower blossoms, language skills will begin to develop right alongside physical feats like walking and running. From the very beginning if you model appropriate manners, and insist that your toddler use them too, your little half pint will be ahead of the game when it comes time to interact with other children. Saying please, thank you, I'm sorry and excuse me are still some of the best ways to begin friendly conversations. Other manners, like eating with your mouth closed, taking turns and sharing might be a bit harder to instill, but starting early will make the lessons easier to learn when the time comes. And once your child has these skills, social interactions will be a lot less confusing and intimidating.

4. Puppet shows.
Puppet shows aren't just a great way to spend a fun afternoon giggling with your little playmate, they are also the perfect setting to model appropriate and inappropriate social interactions. A great way to do this is to make puppets using pictures of your toddler and some of her friends. Then tell stories about real and imagined social situations, like the time Suzy asked to borrow your toddler's toy rocket ship. Highlighting positive moments when your toddler made the right choice is great. Negative situations should mostly be imaginary, to keep a positive light on your toddler's experience. Also, try to cast your toddler's puppet in the roll of instructor to the other puppets, showing them the polite way to behave, and reminding them of fun ways to play together. If your toddler wants to control the puppets, of course let her. Then pay close attention to the way she makes the puppets play and talk together. Often a child's concerns and fears can be expressed more clearly through this type of play than through any other.

5. Ask your toddler for help with chores.
Nothing builds confidence better than a job well done. As your toddler begins to identify himself as a member of the family more and more, he will probably express interest in grown up activities. He may want to help sweep the floor, carry the groceries and wash the dishes. Every time you let him help he will learn that he has valuable contributions to offer the world. That may sound dramatic, but right now, you and your home are his world, and if he can offer a part of himself to make that world better for everyone in it, he must be a pretty great person. Whether you want to introduce standards that his contributions have to measure up to now or later, I just urge you to keep those standards reachable. For example, if he wants to wash the table it would be reasonable for you to require that he wash all around the edges. But if you insist that the table must be completely clean, with no missed spots, he may learn that he is not good enough. It is a delicate balance to strike, but as long as you express appreciation and show that you value your toddlers contribution, he will gain loads of confidence which will benefit him for years to come.

Many parents see themselves in their children, and many of our own anxieties about our childhood social interaction will color the fears we have for our kids. It's always a good idea to take a moment or two when worries start to crowd in to step back and take a good look at your toddler. We can hope to make the best possible impact on our little ones, but in the end, our kids will be their own people, with their own experiences. If you have found these tips to be helpful, please pass them on to any parents of toddlers you know. Questions, comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for the best baby toys 0-3 months.

Deciding what kinds of toys to get for your baby is a very important job. An enormous amount of development and brain growth happen in the first three months. New neural pathways are being formed all the time, and play is a huge part of the appropriate stimulation of that development. While just about any toy that isn't a choking hazard will be good for your baby, my personal top picks are listed below.

1. Black and white mobile.
Shortly after your baby is born, she will be able to see in slightly fuzzy black and white. Since she can only see for about 8 to 10 inches, and will not have very good motor coordination yet, hanging images nearby so that she can look at them is a great idea. There are a few commercial black-and-white mobiles, or you can make your own. Just be sure that if you make one to keep it out of reach of your baby, since it may not be safe to be chewed on. Black and white images will be the most enjoyable for your baby through the first couple of months because the high contrast will make them easier to focus on. As your baby gets older and her eyesight improves, colors and more complex shapes will also become more interesting.

2. Baby gym.
This contraption is a great invention. My only argument with it is that it can encourage back time more than it encourages tummy time. However, if you make an effort to limit the amount of time your baby spends on his back in the gym, it is still a lot of fun. The cause-and-effect connection is easily made with baby gyms that have crinkly cloth flaps, little mirrors and peek-a-boo images for your little giggle bug to find. This toy will also last until your baby begins to scoot and crawl, so it has a pretty long life compared to many baby toys.

3. Rattle.
Any rattle will do. A small heavy-duty maraca, a plastic bead filled shaker or a wooden rain-stick are all great options. Rattles are the most basic of baby toys, they have been around almost as long as people have. Some of the earliest artifacts ever recovered were rudimentary forms of baby rattles. The rattle stimulates sound-orientation, cause and effect, and fine motor skills. All around, this toy is a great one for your baby. Also, rattles stay interesting to your baby for up to two years, and even longer as a part of music education, so it is a toy that will grow with your little hermit crab.

4. Bells.
Bells are really just a fancier form of the basic rattle. But there is unquestionably a very high amount of fun and interest that most babies have for the clear ringing tones of metal bells. The most important thing to consider when looking at bells is safety. Jingle bells can be choking hazards, and even the striker from regular bells can become this type of concern. The best type of bell for a baby is one that is encased within cloth or better yet, a metal rattle. This site is a great place to find my very favorite kind of baby bell-rattle. The major drawback is that they can be quite expensive. Though if you are not on a budget you could also look at their interlocked silver teething rings which double as bell-like toys.

5. Shatter-proof Mirror.
One of the first combinations of shapes that your baby will be able to recognize will be a human face. Most new parents could spend hours just gazing at their precious new bundle of baby rolls, and there is nothing wrong with that. However, if you want to mix it up, a great toy for your baby is herself! Babies love to look at other babies, and at this early age, their reflection will seem to be exactly that. Then, when your baby begins to develop more of a sense of self, a mirror will be great to give her a clear mental image of what her expressions look like, and what the difference is between her face and other peoples faces. This is a very fun and educational toy, just be absolutely certain that the mirror you get is shatter-proof. As a side note, bendable baby mirrors are not a very good choice, because the images on them are warped and indistinct. If you want a mirror for developmental stimulation be sure to get one that is flat and rigid.

Trick: Water bottle.
One of the funnest and most fascinating toys for your baby is an old water bottle. You can leave a little water in it, or dry it out and throw some beans and bells into it. It crinkles when your baby squeezes it, it rattles or sloshes when your baby shakes it and it is light and easy to grab. I recommend taking off the paper label, half-flattening it and then sealing the lid on with hot glue, this will keep the squish-able crinkling quality, and minimize the possibility of your baby getting it open. You can put glitter in the water, or dry it and put small pebbles or twigs in it, there are endless possibilities for this amazing baby toy that only costs a buck or two. Just be sure that if you have any items that could be choking hazards in the bottle that you do seal it securely, babies often figure out how to twist off a lid long before you would think that they would.

Babies tend to find and make toys out of anything around them that they can get their tiny hands on. But to be safe, you should always inspect and ensure the safety of any new toys before they go into your baby's mouth. Watching your little dimpled doll figure out new toys is almost as fun for you as it is for your baby. And similarly, when you are picking out a new toy for your baby, if it is a toy that looks fun to you, chances are that your baby will love it too. If you have found these tips helpful please forward them to any new or expecting parents you know. Questions, comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for hotel arrangements when traveling with your baby.

Whether you are going on a vacation or visiting friends and family, traveling with a newborn or any baby can be a daunting prospect. Though there are a lot of ways a trip with a baby can go wrong, there are also ways that you can prepare for many of the potential pitfalls. Because I know the uncertainty that many new parents face when when planning their first hotel stay with their new baby, here are some of my most useful tips to help you be more prepared.

1. Bring age-appropriate baby proofing.
For an infant, there is really not much you will need to do to increase the safety of your hotel. However, if your baby can roll over, crawl or pull up to a standing position there are a few things you could do to make your room more safe. If your baby can roll over, you will need to always place pillows or rolled up blankets next to her if she is placed on the bed. If you lay her on a blanket on the floor, you should block access under beds, and cover or blockade floor vents.
For a crawler, outlet covers, curtain pulls and electrical cords should be secured, as well as taping a bit of padding (I use baby wash clothes and artists tape, because the tape comes off without harming paint or finishes) over any low furniture corners. For a near-toddler, secure drawers and cabinets, tape padding on higher corners and secure lamps so that they cannot be pulled down on your baby's head by her tugging on the cord.

2. Bring a hint of home.
If there is a certain scent that you use in your home, like an air freshener or scented cleaner, bring it with you and give your hotel room a good once-over with it. Also items like a used crib sheet can be helpful because scents that your baby finds familiar are often natural body scents that are absorbed into cloth. Your baby has a strong association with smell, and having something familiar, like a scent, can really soothe him. The familiar scent will also assist with sleep and eating. When your chubby little cuddle bug is constantly trying to orient himself in a new environment it can be hard to relax or concentrate on eating for very long. The weakest of your baby's senses is eyesight, so bringing familiar visual stimuli will probably not be as helpful, unless it is something very familiar to your baby, like a mobile or a baby gym.

3. Find out where the local hospital and other emergency services are located.
Your hotel can often supply you with a list of local medical services, but you may want to do a little bit of checking on your own, so that if there is a hospital that is better for babies, you know where it is located and what it is called. Chances are that you will not need such a service, but knowing where they are, and how to get to them will lighten your stress load quite a bit, and in a worse-case-scenario, your baby will be able to receive medical attention much faster.

4. Ask about baby rental equipment like cribs, strollers and highchairs.
Often hotels supply guests with a complimentary crib for babies, but at certain times of the year, there may be a shortage of supply. When asking about the availability of this type of equipment, you can also request reservations if necessary and find out the rates if the hotel charges for the use of baby equipment. In the event that your hotel does not supply the types of baby equipment that you need, you can arrange to bring your own, look into other baby equipment rental shops, or purchase second-hand equipment for the duration of your trip, then re-donate it upon your departure.

5. Some toys that are old, some that are new.
While you will absolutely want to bring a few of your baby's favorite music, books and toys, having a stash of new items to introduce along the way is a great idea. Sometimes your little darling will be cranky and impatient, and old toys will most likely not be a good enough distraction. This is the perfect time to bring out a brand-new item for your baby's enjoyment. It might feel like bribery, but your little honey-suckle is too young yet to grasp the concept of behavior modification for reward, that skill usually kicks in after the age of one at the earliest.

Travelling with your baby will get easier with practice, so don't let the details stress you out to the point that you decide not to go. Over and over again I hear from parents about how easy their babies were to travel with. It is just getting over the initial stress and adjustment to the new environment that can sometimes be a little bumpy. If you have found these tips to be helpful, please forward them to any new or expecting parents you know. Questions, comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for changing a baby's diaper.

Learning to change a baby's diaper is rather tricky. They seem to be determined to stick their feet right in the middle of the mess, and then they pee everywhere. Cleaning your little chickadee's undercarriage can be frustrating to say the least. Here are a few tricks that I have learned over the years that have made the dirty job a little cleaner.

1. Always use a changing pad, even on the changing table.
Even when your baby is only wet, having a changing pad is a great idea. A baby who is getting changed often feels inspired by all of the commotion down there to add a little more excitement to the party. This can mean a big mess, and a lot of laundry, unless you were prepared with a changing pad. Often when mid-diapering accidents happen an changing pad will catch all of the extra goop. This will save you from having to own three or four changing table covers, and needing to constantly launder them.

2. Hold both of your baby's feet in one hand to lift her bottom up.
This maneuver sounds more tricky than it is. if you can hold one ankle with your pointer finger and thumb, then wrap your other three fingers around the second ankle, you can do it. Then when both ankles are secure, bring your baby's feet up near her face. This should gently and naturally lift your baby's bottom an inch or two off of the diaper and make it easier to reach. Babies are very flexible, and though this position may look uncomfortable, it is not for most babies. One exception is, if you baby spits up every time you try to do this, she probably has reflux, and this position will not be ideal for her. If this is the case, try rolling your baby away from you onto her side to expose her booty for washing.

3. Use the clean front of the diaper for the first wipe of dirty diapers.
Sometimes our babies make quite large sticky messes in their fluffy little butt covers. These can use up a huge amount of wipes, which don't come cheap. To save a little elbow grease and a little extra change, when you first open your little food processor's diaper, take a hold of the front of the diaper and wipe from front to back. One big wipe is all that this move is good for. It doesn't clean the whole mess, it just takes off the top layer, so that what is left is easier to deal with. When you reach the back of your baby's rear end with the front of the diaper, just leave it there. This keeps your baby from re-dipping into the mess while you begin cleaning the rest of his hiney. You can also take the diaper away, if you have a handy place to stash it until you can deal with it by itself. The reason I leave the diaper there, is it is one more thing between my changing pad and changing table, so that even if I can't keep both completely clean, I can often reduce the mess.

4. Drape a baby washcloth over your boy's little fire hose.
This can apply to girls who spray when they are being changed too. For some reason, the cool air maybe, babies love to go wee-wee when they are naked. Since getting urine squirted all over the room is probably not one of the things you want to deal with, simply draping a bit of cloth, or a baby-wipe over the front section of your little fire-fighter during a diaper change can save you a major headache.

5. Have a squirt bottle with your cleanser in it handy.
If you have read my tips for natural remedies for diaper rash, you know that I prefer to have natural ingredients with which to wash my little ones buns. I got a great tip from JJ Keith (@jj_keith on twitter, a great person to follow) to keep my natural cleansers in a squirt bottle, and it is SO much easier! Make sure to always clean in the folds. It can be awkward, but it is very important to remove all of the waste. I also recommend keeping any powders (like cornstarch) in old spice bottles (It is much easier to sprinkle if the lid has holes than if it is just open), and oils (like olive oil) work great in old hand-soap pump style bottles. Always be sure to clean any recycled containers thoroughly before using them for your baby's rear-end care kit.

Changing diapers is not fun, not easy and not tidy, but it can be a little less work with a few handy techniques, and a little practice. If you have found these tips helpful, please forward them to any new or expecting parents you might know. Questions, Comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

Toddler Tuesday: 5 tips for your first steps in discipline.

Telling your baby "no"is kind of hard the first few times, but as time goes on and your little rebel begins finding more and more ways to get your heart rate up, it hardly seems sufficient. When the day comes that you tell your little mongoose "no" and he responds by looking right at you while he does it anyway, the time has come for discipline. The word discipline can conjure up some pretty nasty memories for some folks, so let me be clear, I do not in any way, ever, for any reason advocate physical violence against children, including spanking or any other form of corporal punishment. Discipline does not have to be mean or rough, it simply needs to be consistent, age (and developmentally) appropriate and clear. As your children get older your own unique forms of discipline will develop naturally from the discipline you established early on. The following are a few tips for creating a stable foundation for discipline.

1. Pick 3 or 4 easily enforceable rules to start.
To make sure your little sugar bun is able to grasp this new concept of "rules", don't overwhelm her. Pick a few very important or common things that you are having some behavior issues around. Then word your rules regarding those few things in easy to remember rhymes. Some examples might be: "The food stays on your tray, or I'll take it away.", "Share your toys, at least one, or these toys are all done." and "If you touch trash, we have to give your hands a wash". The reason to have the rules rhyme is to differentiate them from normal language, so your toddler can easily recognize them. This also keeps things that are rules clarified from normal "yes" and "no" directions or guidance. As time goes on and you need to add more official rules to the list, you don't need to use rhymes, but expressing the new rule clearly will help your child know what is expected of them.

2. Always identify the consequence with the rule.
If possible, try to include the consequence for breaking a rule as part of the original rhyme. This will assist your toddler in relating the cause and effect principle to their own actions. If the whole rhyming thing makes you feel silly, using a nice rhythm is nearly as effective. You might try something like: "If paper goes in your mouth it goes in the trash" and "Throwing your toys makes them go away".

3. Dangerous things are more serious.
For some things you need to really get your little pupil's attention. Things like touching the oven, or poking things into outlets, are dangerous behaviors, and need something more than words to help your toddler remember why she shouldn't do them. When your little chef reaches for the knobs on the front of the stove, in an authoritative and slightly loud voice say "No! Dangerous!". Then flip your finger against the fingertips of your little one just before you grab her hands to lead her away. The flipping of the fingertips creates a sharp sudden discomfort that goes away quickly. This discomfort will be associated both with the stove and with the words "no" and "dangerous", which will help curb the behavior more quickly next time. Eventually, you will be able to tell your child that something is dangerous, and they will avoid it on their own.

4. Tone of voice.
It is very important that you do not engage in games with your little clown while trying to enforce discipline. If you use a playful friendly voice when you tell your toddler to stop throwing cereal on the floor, chances are that the activity will be recognized as a game, and even more cereal will get thrown to the floor. Think of the tone of voice that a police officer has, no-nonsense, firm and serious, this is the perfect tone of voice to use when reminding your little bib decorator about the rules. No need to shout or raise your voice, a clear definitive recitation of the rule, followed by immediate enforcement, is all that it takes to get the message across. You don't need to act "mad" or "cross" with your toddler, as a matter of fact if the enforcement of the rule makes him cry, you can immediately comfort and snuggle him, just do not apologize for enforcing the rule. It is important that your toddler sees you as being just as subject to the rules as he is. If you apologize, you will be identifying yourself as the cause for the loss of the toy instead of reinforcing that it was the actions of your toddler that lead to the toy being gone. Take a moment while comforting your little snoopy to re-tell the story of how the consequence happened, and be sure to lay full blame on the actions that your toddler chose, not on you, and not on your toddler, squarely on the choice of actions.

5. Remove attention from bad behavior.
Since you will no doubt have many more rules than 3 or 4 that you would like to implement, a good tool to discourage undesirable behavior that you don't have a rule for yet is to express a kind of disappointed lack of interest when your little bug-catcher acts out. For example, if your toddler throws her cup on the floor during lunch, don't look surprised and make a game out of it. Look down slowly, then let your eyes wander away from your toddler while muttering something like "that's too bad, guess you're not thirsty." This lack of reaction will bore your toddler quickly, and they will move on to fun activities that get a big giggle out of mommy, like taking a big bite or holding their spoon just right. You can replace the dropped sippy cup when your little lunch-muncher is not paying attention.

Trick: Model discipline behaviors with toys.
While playing with your toddler on the floor, take some time to act out some social scenarios with a couple of the stuffed animals, including breaking rules and obeying them. Giving your toddler a physical visual reference for what will happen if a rule is broken will help them anticipate consequences and make choices that have a more desirable outcome.

Trick: Positive feedback.
This is probably the hardest skill to develop for effectively disciplining your toddlers. The fact is that when they are behaving, we just don't notice them as much. It is very important that you make a concerted effort to identify, point out and celebrate the times when your toddler is faced with the choice of obeying a rule or disobeying it, and he chooses obedience. Over time you will not have to be as aware and engaged in your child's choices all the time, but at the outset, it will make learning the concept of following rules, and making smart choices, easier to grasp.

Beginning the disciplining process with your little star is never going to be easy, but if you start early, at around 12 or 18 months, not only will the twos go a bit more smoothly, but you will have a solid foundation on which to base future rules. Toddlers are bright and will catch on pretty quick to the way things really work, so if you are having trouble maintaining discipline, take a hard look at how you are implementing the new rules, and especially your tone of voice. Chances are, with a few tweaks, you will be able to convince your little bunny that you mean business, and the behavior problems will melt away. If you have found these tips to be helpful, please forward them to any parents of toddlers you might know. Questions, comments and suggestions* are always welcome. Happy parenting.

*This topic was suggested by @katrinayellow, follow her on twitter. She is a great resource for breast feeding information!

5 tips for saving money when you have a new baby.

Saving money has become a popular trend lately, but how can you cut back on expenses now that you have a baby on the way? Parents overwhelmingly don't want to compromise their little one's comfort or safety, but they want to make smart economic decisions too. So I have identified a few areas of baby "fat" and have some pointers on how you can "trim" it.

1. Breastfeed.
Seriously, the amount that is charged for formula, (which is a severely inferior form of nutrition anyway) is out of control! Also, the bottles, nipples, warmers and all of the paraphernalia that goes with bottle feeding your baby don't come cheap either. So, if from day one you are focused and determined to make breastfeeding work, you can save a sizable chunk of change. It won't be easy, at least most of the mothers I have talked to say that the first few weeks, even the first month or two, of breastfeeding were terribly uncomfortable and stressful. However, there is lots of help out there to assist you with everything from finding the best latch, to treating sore nipples. You might even take a gander at my own "5 tips for pain-free breastfeeding". Just keep reminding yourself that the benefits your baby will get from it, and the financial savings as well, are more than enough reasons to keep trying when it gets tough.

2. Cloth Diapers.
Sure they are a bit more pricey up front, and a little more work down the line, but over all they are an amazing way to save not only the environment, but your wallet as well. There have been many advances in cloth diapering in the last 10 to 20 years, so it's not quite as hard a choice as it once was. If you are looking for real, lasting savings, invest in some of these fluffy little bottom covers for your baby, and smile to yourself every time you hear other mothers complain about how many diapers their little super-pooper is going through, and how expensive it is over the next two years.

3. Recycled Clothing.
I know that no one likes to be the "Second Hand Rose", but honestly, your baby doesn't know any different, and he will have grown out of the hand-me-downs before you know it. There are many ways to hook yourself up with a great source for recycled baby clothes. Basically any parent of a baby who is around 6 months older than yours will likely be looking to unload a box or two of gently used baby clothes. So, ask at church, synagogue or temple, at your knitting circle, online communities, even a neighborhood block party is a good place to find a source for new-to-me outfits. The money you save will really add up over the first couple of years, since every three months or so your little bundle of joy will need a whole new wardrobe.

4. Public Library.
Every couple of months there is a new must-have parent-to-be book on the market. Some of them are great, some of them are fairly redundant. However, they all are going to cost you, unless you take a trip to your local library every month or so to pick one up for free. Classics like the "What to Expect When You're Expecting" series and " The Attachment Parenting Book : A Commonsense Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Baby" may cost quite a bit at amazon, but they are all available at your local library for nothing. Another benefit of this approach is that you can check out several competing perspectives on parenting and compare them to find the best fit for your family without dropping a dime (unless you forget to return them on time).

5. Home Made Birth Announcements.
Birth announcements might seem like a bit of an extravagance at a time when you are trying to pinch your pennies, but one of the results of sending out these cute little cards is a sudden influx of gifts and cash from friends and family to help you out with the new baby. With a computer and a printer, you can put together a pretty nice baby announcement at home and print out however many copies you might need. Then, for pennies on the dollar, you can spread the word to all who might be interested that your new adorable little tax deduction has arrived.

One of the side effects of becoming a parent is often a sudden awareness of exactly how poor you really are. However, with a few extras trimmed away, and a few frugal substitutions made, you can make the transition into family life with less of a financial splash. If you have found these tips to be helpful, please forward them to any new or expecting parents you might know. Comments, questions and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

5 tips for weaning your baby to the bottle.

There are many different perspectives and philosophies about breastfeeding, and how long a mother should continue it if she is able. These tips are not meant to encourage or pressure anyone to extend or shorten the time that they feel it is appropriate to breastfeed. That is a personal choice, one which I think should be made after educating yourself thoroughly about any benefits or potential risks that might result from weaning your baby at various ages. These tips are designed to help parents who, for any reason, need to encourage their baby to switch to the bottle for sustenance. I wholly support breast feeding and breast milk as the first choice for babies health, but I recognise that some parents also have very valid reasons for needing to wean their babies to a bottle, and I know it can be a very difficult task sometimes. These are a few things I know that can help you and your baby get through the transition from breast to bottle more smoothly.

1. Warm the milk & nipple.
Though warming baby bottles has fallen out of fashion, if your little honey-suckle is turning her nose up at the bottle it may well help to try warming it a bit. The milk in your baby's bottle is closest to the temperature of your own breast milk when you drip some on your wrist and you cannot feel a temperature change. If you drip some breast milk or formula on your wrist and it feels cool, you should warm it a bit longer, if the fluid feels warm or hot on your wrist, do not feed it to your baby until it has cooled down. Also, the rubber of the nipple may feel cool and unappetizing to your little one, so I recommend that you cover the tip of the bottle with a finger tip or cap, then turn the bottle upside-down. The warm breast milk or formula in the bottle will warm the nipple to a comfortable level after about a minute.

2. Introduce a nipple shield first.
If you have the luxury of time, try introducing a nipple shield during breast feeding about a week before trying the bottle. The soft, but smooth texture of the nipple shield will be easy to adjust to while everything else in your baby's feeding remains the same. Then, when you try the bottle, if you use a silicone nipple, the texture will be the same as that of the shield, so there will be less for your baby to adjust to all at once.

3. Serve breast milk to start.
Another way to reduce the number of things that your baby has to adjust to is to while weaning is to try to offer fresh (opposed to frozen or refrigerated) breast milk rather than formula in the bottle for as long as you can. If you are able to continue to offer breast milk in the bottle for a long period, this is of course the most healthful type of weaning you could do for your baby, but if you must supplement or transition fully to formula, try to introduce the bottle filled with breast milk before making the switch. Then, using a gradual approach, mix a little more formula with the milk at each feeding, until you run out of breast milk.

4. Try different nipple shapes and flows.
For some babies it is easier to maintain a good bottle-latch on a broad based nipple. For other babies the slender based nipples are easier to adjust to. There are many different shapes and styles of nipple and bottle on the market, if your baby consistently rejects one, try another. For babies that are particularly difficult to wean, you might want to try the Adiri bottle. It's design is unique in it's similarity to the breast. The only real drawback is that it can be a bit pricey. Sometimes the only thing that is keeping a baby from accepting a bottle is a design that she finds uncomfortable. To save money, try borrowing different bottle types from other mothers to try for a feeding or two. If your baby likes a certain design, you can invest in just that one kind of bottle, rather than having 5 or 6 different kinds of rejected bottles sitting around gathering dust.

5. Have a non-lactating support person provide feeds for a while.
When your baby smells you, he will associate your smell almost exclusively with food for the first 2 months. After that, though there will be many other things your little chick associates with you, food will always be a major one as long as you continue lactating. Part of the reason for this is that babies can smell breast milk, and have a very strong mental attachment to it, much stronger than with formula. So, trying to get your baby to take breast milk or formula from a bottle can be very difficult for a lactating mother, because your baby will expect to nurse when he smells your milk. That is why if you can get your spouse, or a good friend to take over a few feedings for you while your baby adjusts to the bottle it will go much more smoothly. By the time you return to feeding your baby, he will be less surprised by the bottle, and your chances of having success will be greatly increased.

Easing your baby through this transition is unquestionably going to be easier on everyone if you take your time and try to let each step along the way gently fall into place as your baby adjusts. However, whether you have all the time in the world or just a few days, I hope these tips will give you a few more ideas to try when you are looking for ways to transition your sweet little jelly belly to the bottle from the breast. If you have found these tips helpful, please forward them to any new or expecting parents you might know. Questions comments and suggestions are always welcome. Happy parenting!

Toddler Tuesday! 5 tips for camping with a toddler.

Toddlers are wild and crazy, you might think that taking them out into the wild would be as natural as breathing, but it is really a lot of work. There are more ways for your snuggly little tsunami to hurt themselves out in the woods than there are in a public restroom! However, getting your favorite bunny-hopper out doors is good for them too. You might not be able to enjoy the peace and solace of nature like you used to, but with a few tips, navigating some of the common pitfalls will be much easier.

1. Child-safe bug repellent.

Coppertone Bug & Sunscreen With Insect Repellent, Kid's Formula, SPF 30 is the highest rated bug repellent for kids on www.goodguide.com, however I prefer a more natural approach. I bring a spray bottle with 2 cups of water, 1 tablespoon eucalyptus oil and 2 tablespoons lemon oil in it. Then while we are camping, I mist his clothes and hat with it every morning, and as soon as the air starts to cool off each evening. I am careful not to get it in his eyes or near his mouth, and always shake it up before each application. This seems to work well in combination with long loose-fitting pants, a long-sleeve shirt and a cotton hat. I try to keep one outfit for him to wear each evening and morning over his regular clothes so that I only have a couple of things that are covered with the smell, which while not unpleasant, can linger in clothing long after it has been washed.

2. Safe play area inside tent.Secure all of your dangerous camping items in containers you can keep outside your tent, and keep the inside area clean and organized. This way, if you need to take a few minutes to start the fire or chop up some potatoes, you can put your toddler in the tent with a few books or toys, unzip all of the windows, and close the main door flap. Your child will be contained and safe while you finish doing whatever it is that you have to do, then you can let him out and resume the chase around the campsite. Make sure your tent is secure and stable before placing your child inside, and never allow yourself to be out of sight or earshot in case your baby needs you.

3. Bring a high chair or booster seat with a buckle.

If it is feasible for you to lug this type of equipment out camping with you, it is a great idea. It's hard enough for your little explorer to hold still long enough for you to get a good picture, let alone long enough to down a whole meal. If you can strap your toddler into a secure seat for 10 to 15 minutes, it will be a lot easier to make sure he is eating and drinking enough. It is also another place you can secure your bouncy one while you do food prep or work on the fire.

4. Pack proper camping attire in place of over-using sunscreen.

Sunscreen is a good idea whenever you and your toddler are outside, but sometimes sunscreen wears off, and it provides no protection from biting insects or rash-producing plants. I recommend that parents pack lightweight long sleeved shirts and long legged pants for sunny camping days. The material is a good way to reduce sun exposure, and it is protective of your child's sensitive skin. Remember to bring a hat, preferably one with a chin-strap to keep it on your toddlers head through wind or rambunctious play. Of course, if you intend on wading in streams or swimming, bring water shoes, a bathing suit, water-safe diapers towels and sunscreen.

5. Pajamas & bedding.

When it comes time to go to bed for the night, you may have the same problem I have. Do you have a wiggle worm who will find a way (while completely asleep) to get out from under any type of blanket you put on her? If so, to make sure she will stay warm enough throughout the night, layer on the pajamas. Several layers of warm pajamas will keep your bundle of kisses warm while allowing a full range of movement. As long as she has a soft comfy surface to sleep on she should be able to stay comfortable until morning, in spite of the cool night air. I like to bring our portable baby cot, but we tend to camp at drive-up sites where this is more feasible.

Camping in the great outdoors, is a wonderful way to share a love of nature with your small child. Though there are many pitfalls awaiting toddlers, if you come prepared for the most common ones, you'll be able to have a much more relaxing time together. Enjoy the summer safely, and you can revel in your little explorer's sense of adventure and fun! If you found these tips helpful, please forward them to any parents of toddlers you might know. Happy parenting!

5 tips for treating diaper rash.

I am often asked what type of treatment I would recommend for diaper rash, my response is immediately, "what kind"? Many first-time parents are not aware that there are different kinds of diaper rash, so this question comes as a surprise to them. There are quite a few different kinds of diaper rash, and for each one there are distinct things that will work better than others. So for my tips today, I will focus on 5 of the most recognizable types of diaper rash, and the treatments that I personally have found to be most effective. Commercial treatments for diaper rash usually do a great job of covering the bases for several types of rash, but can sometimes have serious drawbacks if used on the wrong rash at the wrong time (what I look for in commercial brands can be found here). For example, Boudreaux's Butt Paste is a great natural ointment for the most common bacterial rashes, but if your baby has a chemical reaction rash or other weeping or bleeding diaper rash, it can cause a painful stinging sensation, and actually exacerbate the rash. If any ointment you are applying to your baby's rash seems ineffective or looks like it is actually causing your baby increased discomfort, discontinue using it at once and ask your pediatrician for advice.

1. For an acidic reaction diaper rash use yogurt, baking soda and Aquaphor.

This rash is purely a reaction to the heated contact between sensitive baby skin and acidic waste. Acidic waste can be caused by reflux, colic, and high acid content in breast milk as well as diarrhea. This rash looks similar to a rug burn, red and raw and will sometimes be bleeding slightly. The first order of business with this rash is to neutralize the acids, Yogurt is a soothing natural antacid, as is baking soda, and mixed together they make an effective paste. Or you can "wash" your baby's behind with yogurt followed by some sterile cool water and then powder the whole undercarriage with the baking powder. At the next changing (which should only be an hour or two later), be sure to use a sealant-type product like olive oil, Aquaphor, or Bag Balm to create a barrier between the stinging effects of urine, or further burning from another acidic bowel movement.

2. For a bacterial diaper rash use bamboo cloth, hair dryer and cornstarch.
This type of rash is one which thrives on a warm moist bottom. Bacteria are everywhere, but at times the balance between good and bad bacteria gets a bit off, and the result is skin irritation. This rash is a cousin to the bed-sore, and similar treatments are effective in treating it. This rash looks bright red, has an unpleasant odor and is probably weeping (oozing a fairly clear and slightly sticky liquid). There is probably more than one affected area, most commonly one quarter sized weeping area on each cheek. Keeping your baby clean and dry is the most effective treatment for this rash. Wash your baby's rear with cool sterile water using a soft naturally antibacterial bamboo wash cloth. Pay special attention to the deep crevice-type areas, since they are commonly effected as well. Use a hair dryer on low to make sure every part of your baby's booty gets completely dry. Apply cornstarch powder over all of your baby's rear and use bamboo cloth diapers (because bamboo is naturally anti-bacterial), if you have some, until the rash goes away.

3. For a diaper rash caused by an allergic reaction, use yogurt, baking soda and olive oil.

This rash is a combination of allergic-type hives and an acidic reaction. When a baby's body detects an undesirable element in the stomach, like an allergen or dangerous bacteria, it gets rid of it the fastest way it can. Often this means vomiting, but sometimes it means diarrhea. And because your baby's food has been forced out so quickly there is still a large amount of stomach acid in it. The allergen in the waste is giving your baby hives, and the acid is causing the hives to burn. This rash will look almost like your baby has little blisters on his bottom, but the bumps will be hard and not fluid-filled. Also, the bumps will only appear in areas where your baby's skin has come into contact with the waste. The entire area of waste contact will be red too, not just the bumps. To treat the acid, use yogurt (unless you are concerned that the allergen might be a dairy product) or baking soda, or a mixture of the two. Continue to change your baby's diaper regularly, and administer a sealant such as olive oil, Aquaphor or Bag Balm to protect your baby's hiney from further exposure to the allergen. The allergic reaction should go away on it's own, just make a mental note of possible food sources for the reaction and have your baby tested for allergies at your next visit to the pediatrician.

4. For a rash caused by a yeast infection, use yogurt, air, Bag Balm and (at times) an anti-fungal cream.
This rash thrives on sugar, and it will eat it where ever it can find it including in the living skin cells of your baby's sensitive bottom. This rash is particularly devious, because if you treat it with corn starch, the yeast, which love natural sugars, will thrive. While your baby's rear may be fairly red all over, what helps in identifying this rash is the red bumps that are in areas not usually too affected by diaper rash, like above the genitals. The red bumps are usually small and mainly visible outside of the crevice-type areas. Sensitive tissue will be red and swollen, but fairly dry to the touch and there might sometimes be a whitish "cheese-like" substance in some of the crevices of your baby's genitals. While your baby always has yeast bacteria present in their body, certain things, like antibiotics, can destroy the bacteria that usually feed on the yeast. These bacteria are highly concentrated in yogurt, and yogurt makes a great treatment for this kind of rash. Make sure your baby's bahookey is clean and dry, for long periods of time. This type of rash usually responds well to the "air-it-out" method. Try giving your baby some tummy time, on a changing pad instead of a quilt, with no diaper. Then, before nap time apply a generous coating of plain unsweetened yogurt to the affected area. For night sleep, I would recommend not applying the yogurt, but use a sealant like Bag Balm instead. Try using a super absorbent disposable diaper just until the rash goes away, because they will be able to keep your baby's bottom drier than other types of diaper. If the rash does not respond you can also apply a topical anti-fungal over-the-counter cream, ask your pediatrician for the appropriate dosage and dosage schedule for your baby.

5. For treatment of a chemical reaction rash use water, Aloe Vera, vitamin E and Petroleum Jelly.

This rash can be caused by harsh chemicals in diapers, wipes, ointments or even from your baby's own physical development. As your baby begins to grow and develop, chemical changes in her own body will sometimes cause reactions to substances that seemed perfectly safe before. The rash is sudden, bright red, and very dry. It is similar to the acid rash in appearance, but will not respond to the antacid treatment. Sometimes this rash will even have painful blisters. Think of it as a severe sunburn, on your baby's butt. Traditionally the single best way to treat this rash is to shield it from contact with harsh substances. I recommend cleaning it thoroughly and gently with running water, if possible, to minimize rubbing against the skin. Even very gentle cloths can feel abrasive to this rash. After you are finished washing, apply a coat of vitamin E and Aloe Vera, to replenish the skin's natural moisture and promote healing, then apply a sealant. Aquaphor and Bag Balm might be effective, olive oil though, is generally not strong enough. The best sealant treatment for overall effectiveness for this rash is usually petroleum jelly. It creates the best seal, keeping your baby's natural moisture in the skin, and keeping the waste or irritating materials from direct contact with the skin. I also would recommend transitioning to a more natural, chemical-free diaper and not using any perfumed ointments on your baby for some time.

There are several more types of diaper rash, and I will probably revisit this topic again at some point to cover them, but these 5 should be enough to get you through most of the types of rash that you will commonly encounter as your baby grows over the first year or so. I hope you find these tips helpful, and if you do I would encourage you to forward this site to any new or expecting parents you might know. Questions and comments are always welcome. Happy Parenting!

5 tips for soothing a colicky baby.

Colic. The dreaded, the mythical, the bane of parental existence... colic. It's such a cute little word when you look at it, yet the meaning it carries is ugly indeed. Crying. Your baby crying and there seems to be nothing you can do to help. The definition of colic is basically a baby who cries at predictable times during the day for around three hours at a time. There is no known cause or cure. Helpful huh? Of course colic has existed since babies have, and mothers over the years have learned a few things to try that might help you and your little screamer through the rough patches. Also, my 5 tips for gas and reflux can also be tried to help remedy colic.

1. The Superman hold.

Hold your baby tummy down, feet pointing at you, with one hand under her belly button and one hand supporting her head. Stand with your legs spread apart and swing your baby through your legs backward and forward, supporting the majority of her weight with the hand on her belly button. You can continue to hold her this way while seated, suspending her between your knees, bouncing a bit. The reason i think that this sometimes works is partly because it helps expel gas, partly because it provides a bit of warmth from your hand that may soothe your baby's abdominal muscles if they are sore and partly because the motion of swinging or bouncing can help a baby focus on her internal equilibrium which takes the focus off of whatever is causing the colic.

2. Examine your diet.

One possible explanation for colic is that it is actually your baby expressing discomfort because of food allergies. If your baby is bottle fed there are many other types of formula you can try, your pediatrician will be able to recommend one that is right for you and your baby. However, if you are breastfeeding, there are a thousand things it could be. Many mothers try to eliminate suspicious foods from their diet one at a time, which can take forever, and is still not guaranteed to help. I recommend a bland your diet for 2 days, then adding foods back in over a couple weeks. Try oatmeal (no milk or sugar) and an apple for breakfast, a baked potato with olive oil (no dairy) and roasted turkey breast for lunch and brown rice, carrots and grilled chicken (no onions) for dinner. As you'll notice the things cut out of this meal plan are dairy, wheat, legumes and most fruits and veggies. The fruits and veggies that are most often the culprit seem to be things like broccoli, onions, beans, acidic fruits, If you are on this diet for a couple of days and see no changes in your babies temperament then chances are it is not something you are eating, and you can either switch out the bland foods for other bland foods to rule out the few things that you were eating, or just go back to your normal eating habits. If your baby suddenly calms though, try reintroducing a few foods a day until your baby begins to be colicky again. Then slowly scale back to pin point which food was the issue. In rare instances there can be more than one allergen causing your baby discomfort, and quite often the cause is not rooted in your diet at all, but eliminating your diet as a cause will save you a lot of guilt and worry.

3. Try sleep-in-motion.

I am not a big fan of using sleep in motion (swings, cars, strollers), because of potential sleep problems that can develop as a result of over using it. However, there are times when helping your baby get some sleep (no matter how) outweighs everything else. First try the baby swing, since that will be the most convenient, then the stroller, and only as a last resort try the car. Though the car can often be the most effective, it is also the most work and the hardest on the environment. If you have a bicycle, and a baby-safe trailer, it is also a good method to try depending on the weather. After your baby is asleep, if you can stop the motion and they stay asleep I highly recommend it. Their sleep will be deeper and more restorative with less outside stimulation to contend with.

4. Use a hair dryer.
The most strange secret weapon against colic is sound. Though no one is certain why, the sound of a hair dryer, vacuum, car engine or fan can get your colicky baby's attention and calm their stress like nothing else. Though I'm sure there is a rational explanation for why this so often works, right now it seems a little like magic. Because leaving electronic devices running for too long both wastes energy and can be a fire hazard using a prerecorded source for the noise is the best option. You can record it yourself or buy recordings here. Just remember that keeping the noise at a fairly high level also seems to help. I recommend starting with the sounds on lower, and slowly turning it up until your baby begins to react positively. Before investing time or money in this solution try the real sound so you can be sure it will work for your baby.

5. A vibrating back massager on the tummy.
When all else seems to be failing, a technique that has worked for me a few times is to get a vibrating back massage device, wrap it in a towel to mute the strength of the vibrations, and apply it gently to your baby's belly. Be careful not to keep the massage device in any one place for too long (over 2 minutes), and try to keep the entire massage under 10 minutes. If you sometimes go as long as 15 it should be okay, but shoot for short sessions. If your baby responds well and falls asleep, stop the massage device and put it away.

Though colic is a difficult thing to go through with your baby, even if all the tips, tricks and hints in the world do not help you can at least take comfort in knowing that it does not last forever. Most colic resolves by 4 months, and %90 of cases resolve by 9 months. I know that it is a small comfort but sometimes even a distant hope is better than none at all. Always remember to keep an eye on your own stress and frustration levels. If you begin to be overwhelmed, laying your baby down in a safe crib and taking a short break, even while they are crying, to calm your nerves can make a huge difference to your ability to cope well with the stress of the situation.

Try to work together with your spouse or partner or supportive friend to give each other support and comfort, assigning blame and picking at each other, though natural, will only add more stress to the situation. Keep your spirits up, lean on each other and try try again until that magical day when your little human cacophony stops crying for no reason and spends the majority of his time being cute. Happy parenting!